[Cairenn]

To all board users:

With apologies to Monty Python:

Vanguard: Yes, I can help you find the Vanguard UI Mod.

Vanguard UI Modders: Oh, thank you. Oh...

Vanguard: To the north there lies a cave -- the cave of VGInterface -- wherein, carved in mystic runes upon the very living rock, the last words of Olfin Bedwere of Rheged... *boom* ...make plain the last resting place of the Vanguard UI Mod.

Sigil Games Online®: Where could we find this cave, O Vanguard?

Vanguard: Follow. But! Follow only if ye be men of valour, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave Vanguard UI Modders, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.

Sigil Games Online®: What an eccentric performance.

*clop clop clop*
*whinny whinny*

Greybur: They're nervous, sire.

Sigil Games Online®: Then we'd best leave them here and carry on on foot. Dis-mount!

Vanguard: Behold the cave of VGInterface!

Sigil Games Online®: Right! Keep me covered.

Greybur: What with?

Sigil Games Online®: W-- just keep me covered.

Vanguard: Too late!

*dramatic chord*

Sigil Games Online®: What?

Vanguard: There he is!

Sigil Games Online®: Where?

Vanguard: There!

Sigil Games Online®: What, behind the Board Troll?

Vanguard: It *is* the Board Troll.

Sigil Games Online®: You silly sod!

Vanguard: What?

Sigil Games Online®: You got us all worked up!

Vanguard: Well, that's no ordinary Board Troll!

Sigil Games Online®: Ohh.

Vanguard: That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered troll you ever set eyes on!

Jalen: You git! I soiled my armour I was so scared!

Vanguard: Look, that Board Troll's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!

Greybur: Get stuffed!

Vanguard: He'll do you up a treat, mate.

Greybur: Oh, yeah?

Jalen: You mangy Scots git!

Vanguard: I'm warning you!

Jalen: What's he do, nibble your bum?

Vanguard: He's got huge, sharp-- eh-- he can leap about-- look at the bones!

Sigil Games Online®: Go on, Aradune. Chop his head off!

Aradune: Right! Silly little bleeder. One Board Troll stew comin' right up!

Vanguard: Look!

*squeak*

Aradune: Aaaugh!

*dramatic chord*

*clunk*